Ascension
by FearTheMightyPen
Summary: With every life comes an end. Most of the time, its not pretty. WARNING: Slash, angst, depressing stuff, character death... all that good stuff
1. Gunshot

**Title ** Ascension  
b Rating PG-13 for swearing, blood, and death  
** Pairings ** Zoro/Sanji, Nami/Luffy, Luffy/Usopp (Omg! I'm trying something different!)  
** Warning and Excuse ** Call me crazy… or depressed, but this just popped into my head… I know… I have a habit of wandering from my other fics -.- Anyway, a warning for character death is needed, since this is about how each of the Pirates will die. I know, depressing…  
** Disclaimer** I don't own One Piece... only the idea of this story

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A single shot signifies more than impending death. It signifies a beginning to many things. A shot can start a race, a fight, a journey… it can be in remembrance to something significant… it can be in homage of the lives lost in a war.

In this particular case, the shot that was fired, cutting a scarlet line in the cheek of a giggling sharpshooter, was both a beginning of a fight, and the beginning of the end. It attracted the attention of the gathered pirates, sending them scattering for their posts as more bullets rained down. The captain laughed, taking in a deep breath and blowing his body up like a balloon, catching the shots and sending them catapulting back at the soldiers.

It was supposed to be a fight like any other… after all, those marines were nothing special.

But it wasn't.

It happened in an instant, and many things could have led to it.

Maybe it was the cannonball that hit the water near the right of the ship. Maybe it was the sword that Zoro had to duck under. Maybe it was the sniggering marine recruit that thought it 'brilliant' to swipe his leg at Zoro's feet from where he was hidden between a barrel and the wall. Either way, it all ended up with Zoro loosing his balance and finding his swords sliding across deck, a gun aimed at his forehead and two swords at his throat.

All activity on the ship stopped as a hoarse cry alerted the rest of the crew to the swordsman's position. The marines were trying to stop the progress of the rest of the crew blasting, punching, kicking, and shoving their way towards Zoro, but nothing was working… and Zoro wasn't really sure that anything was going to work. After all, he was staring a loaded, ready to fire gun and metal was shallowly cutting into the skin of his neck. The end looked pretty near, and frankly… he didn't want the crew to harm themselves trying to help him. It was that macho manliness thing kicking in again.

The man holding the gun (Zoro recognized the pattern on his jacket and identified him as a Captain) drew back his lips in a sneer, cracking his wrist in his preparation to fire the gun. It was all an unneeded show to the poor little marine boy poking his head up from behind the barrel.

"Looks like this is the end of Pirate 'Hunter' Roronoa Zoro," the man said, his voice mocking as he steadied the gun in his shaking (probably more out of anticipation than fear) hand. The men at either side of Zoro lessened their pressure onto the swords, and Zoro narrowed his shadowed eyes to glare at both of them.

But when he turned to glare, they were gone.

One second they were there, swords ghosting over the skin on his neck, and the next a very unconscious marine had barreled into them, flying through the air with a force that only two people could have generated… and judging by the shoe-print on his face, Zoro automatically knew who had bought him a few more seconds of time.

Well, more than a few, for the Captain was sputtering in disbelief, his finger limp on the trigger. Zoro took that moment to push himself up, glancing over to the side to see the cook that had come to his rescue.

There he was, the idiotic blonde in that equally idiotic suit he always wore. But something was wrong, something wasn't right, for Sanji was currently letting out a stream of profanities that Zoro recognized as the ones currently associated with his name, as he ran towards Zoro's position. The swordsman furrowed his brow and frowned as Sanji reached him, grabbed his shoulders, and attempted to throw both of them out of the way, landing heavily on the deck as a horrible, booming sound finally reached Zoro's ears through the pounding of adrenaline and the slight prick of pain he felt in his side. Sanji was sprawled on top of him, chest moving in scarily irregular heaves, and Zoro placed two hands on his shoulders, not attempting to move them, but just trying to figure what had i _happened_. /i

Then, as he saw the smoking gun ripped out of the snickering Captain's hands by a snarling, mad-faced Luffy, a Luffy he had rarely seen in his life, everything crashed down on him in one painful, sickening realization.

In the split second that he had turned his head to look at Sanji, the marine Captain had regained his ability to control his body and had cocked his gun. In the time it took for the blonde to run over to him, he had pulled the trigger, and that booming sound that took forever to reach his muddled brain had been the sound of a pistol going off at close range.

And, of course, this all boiled down to the trembling cook on top of him who i _still /i _hadn't made a move to get off of Zoro.

It was giving the swordsman a really bad feeling in the pit of his stomach, the kind of feeling you get when the world and everything you knew was ripped out from under you.

"Sanji?" he ventured, allowing his eyes to return to the mess of blonde hair below his nose. The head weakly moved, but the direction it did so made that sinking feeling increase ten-fold. Sanji had shaken his head. He had said no to a question Zoro's mind hadn't even formulated yet. He had answered a question that never wanted to leave Zoro's lips. He had confirmed Zoro's darkest suspicions… and explained that steady feeling of warm liquid soaking through his haramaki and into his shirt. "No…" he said, his voice merely a gasp and he wrapped his arms around the Cook's shoulders, rolling them over so that Sanji's head and back rested against the deck as he rolled off of the cook, his hand resting on and applying a slight pressure to the part of the black suit that was stained a deep crimson. The fabric felt wet and slick beneath his fingers, adding to his growing sense of panic and anger. The chef's eyes were closed, his face pale and a slight trickle of blood was moving down his face from his lips as he let his head roll to one side, cheek pressed against the deck as he attempted to cough. It was a pitiful sound, but it made Sanji's entire body jump and tremble as crimson flecks painted the wood.

The battle was gone, and Zoro could hear and see nothing besides Sanji laying on the wood, his harsh gasps of the chef's breathing filling his ears and mind until they sounded like cannon fire.

"Goddammit, you stupid love-cook," he croaked out, still kneeling with one hand pressed over the bleeding wound. "You couldn't have just kicked something at his stupid hand? You couldn't have just yelled for Robin to get the gun? You… god… why?" Zoro closed his eyes, screwing them shut against the prickling of what he knew would be tears in his eyes.

There was a slight tug on his sleeve by a shaky hand, and Zoro's eyes snapped open, searching for and finding that tired, dull blue eye staring up at him from a face with a look of annoyance slapped on it. Sanji had rolled his head up, bangs slightly displaced over his cheek, causing the second eye, the one that Zoro had only seen on a few occasions, to peer up at him through the fringe of blonde hair. Absently, almost without realizing he did it, Zoro reached up, brushing the bangs back off of Sanji's face as they just sat there, staring at each other with understanding, pain, and just general annoyance written in the depths of their eyes.

"You…" Sanji's voice was so soft that Zoro wasn't even sure he heard it. "… are such a… fuckin'… idiot," those lips, so often clamped around a cigarette or spouting words that no one would expect to come from such a kind looking face, quirked upwards in a smile… not a smirk, but a smile that Zoro had only seen directed at him a handful of times. "Couldn't have moved on your own, huh?" he asked, voice getting more and more crackly. Zoro hardly noticed a furry figure enter his vision and kneel on the other side of the chef, choked words of comfort coming from behind twin waterfalls of tears. Sanji's hand fell from his shirt, and Zoro used every one of his honed and perfected reflexes to snatch it out of midair and tug Sanji's arm up, pressing the curled and limp knuckles to his lips as he stared at the cook, everything he wanted to say but couldn't in that simple gesture.

"Sanji…" a voice, a voice that wasn't his own, snapped Zoro out of the world he had created for the two of them, and he all but glared at Luffy before he saw it… the face he never wanted to see again in his life… the face of ultimate despair and agony… a face that looked like Luffy had lost the one thing guiding him forward through life, the face of someone who doubted their dream.

"Don't…" Sanji said, and Zoro was surprised at how strong the blonde's voice seemed, despite the constantly fading light in his eyes and the pallor and cold that was sweeping across his already creamy skin, "…even start to… doubt," Sanji's tone left no questions, and despite the severity of the situation, it wrung a tearful smile out of Luffy. "Oi, Marimo," Sanji's voice was weak again, and when he turned his blue eyes to look at Zoro, the swordsman had a feeling that the cook wasn't even seeing him anymore. "Find that damn ocean for me… go… and smoke in it… or something… and… kick that shitty… geezer in his… shitty head for me, yeah?"

By the time Zoro opened his mouth to respond, Sanji's eyes had fallen closed and his body shook with his last labored breath before everything was still and the only sound heard were the sobs of everyone, every single one, of the crew.

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I'd forgotten how it felt to be shot… it had been a while, after all. Sure, Luffy's punches and the whacks of Zoro's sheathed swords helped remember the pain… but I'd forgotten how sudden and without warning that bullet could go right through a human body, snuffing out a life without any effort. It was kind of an eerie feeling that made the outer reaches of my body go instantly numb as the fabric I had been clenching with anger fell away from my fingers, my body heading down to the deck, following the swordsman I had bodily shoved out of the way. By the time we landed on deck, I barely felt it, and instead leaned into the warm, familiar feel of Zoro's body against mine. I couldn't think, couldn't hear… and all I could do was shake my head at whatever Zoro had said, mainly trying to shake off the buzz of something that made fear grow in the pit of my stomach.

When he turned me over, I could think and breathe again, although it hurt to do so. Honestly, when you're shot in the chest, its not always the best thing to press down on the wound.

But then again, that look the swordsman was giving me was one of fear, and it made everything clear in that one second of coherent thought.

I was dying.

Goddamnfuckingshit I was dying.

That would explain the eerie numbness I felt instead of head-splitting pain, though.

Still, my mouth was moving, and I could hardly hear what I was saying, so I let it run, taking in everyone's faces with a sense of calm… until I looked into Zoro's eyes, desperately wishing I could still feel the fingers pressed up against his lips. How I yearned for that to be the last thing I felt, not the hardness of the deck and the wetness of my own blood. Then, everything started spinning, whirling out of focus, and I heard myself asking Zoro to fulfill my dream for me… to find that ocean and do something so totally me and so unlike him in it. For some reason, I could feel tears in my eyes, and right before my vision tunneled I could see the tears in his too… the understanding as he tried to speak…

… and then there was light.

It was okay. I was okay… in that moment after I closed my eyes, I felt warm, and a smile brushed over my face. I was happy, and even though I missed them, even though I knew they would miss me, I knew that someday we would all meet in this place I hadn't even set eyes on yet. I knew that no matter what happened, the purity of our souls would bring us all together, one by one, to sail on this sea in the ship we said farewell to. The smell of orange blossoms and the familiar creaking of wood against its metal bandages filled my ears, and as I finally opened my eyes that feeling of calm intensified. It didn't matter that I was dead, it didn't matter that I had tears rolling down my eyes.

I had finally come to that friend who had been waiting patiently for me. I was the first to join it, and I could feel its happiness in every fiber of my being.

"Sorry we made you wait so long," I said, my voice echoing in the stillness of whatever ocean we sailed on. "But lets hope it's a long while until the rest of the crew finds us… How about I go cook us something… how does that sound Merry?"

Out of the corner of my eye, in the mist and light of the clouds surrounding us, I swore I saw the dim outline of a figure nod as a wispy smile of utter joy crossed its features.

I could survive here… after all, in the days of pirates, it wouldn't be long until someone stumbled across us, floating in this heavenly place so unlike any mortal's dream of heaven.

I finally felt like I was home, a simple housekeeper cooking dinner for his returning family. For once, I didn't care if they let the food get cold.


	2. Pregnancy

**Disclaimer:** I don't own One Piece, cause if I did, Sanji and Zoro would be all over each other and Blackbeard would already have his butt kicked … damn guy… -walks off mumbling about stupid Blackbeard and his stupid powers-

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The irony of life, and death, is that right after something bad happens to a person, their dreams come true. Such is the case when an athlete looses a leg and finds that he had just been accepted to a college on a running scholarship. Such is it when an artist goes blind just before they are written to, saying that someone will pay them millions to do their craft. Such is it when a chef dies, only to have the pirate ship he was on to land in the middle of the All Blue only two days later.

It was a cruel irony, and one that the Straw Hats never got over.

There had been a storm, a storm of such ferocity and unpredictability, that no matter how fast Nami called out orders and the crew scrambled to obey them, they were swept into the wind and water, clinging on for dear life and praying that they could live through this storm, just so they wouldn't be kicked in the head by their dearly departed chef for being too early. In all honesty, there were moments during that storm that even Luffy admitted defeat… but every time they were just near loosing all hope, the storm would change in a way that they could all catch their breaths and build up the hope that they would survive, just before their ship was taken by the storm once more. So went the cycle for three days, until the winds became so fierce that they caught the edge of the furled sail and lifted the ship into the sky, the wind and water of a cyclone somehow supporting the heavy wooden frame without breaking it. Two hours of near death experiences within the billowing winds passed before suddenly everything stopped, and the ship crashed down in the middle of an ocean, throwing most of the members off with the shock of the fall.

No one drowned, but everyone nearly died when they recognized fish that shouldn't be in the Grand Line swimming before their eyes. There were tuna from East Blue, swordfish from West, whales from South, and a rare species of dolphin from North.

Zoro spent that night at the bow of the ship, staring into the water. No one dared to approach him or speak to him, not even when he lifelessly came in, grabbed himself a makeshift dinner, and then returned to his position, half-heartedly chewing the meager meal and staring into the sea.

The next morning, Chopper noticed that none of Sanji's cigarettes were on board.

When confronted about it, Zoro said he dumped them into the ocean. No need to keep them anymore.

No one said a word about it since.

They sailed lifelessly through the ocean, searching for an island to set the log pose in (it had taken to spinning wildly, and Nami had replaced it for a compass, which seemed to keep pointing in the relatively same direction) for nearly three months, keeping alive by catching fish and cooking it when Robin and Chopper declared the fish safe and non-poisonous. No longer did they have the skilled eyes and hands of Sanji to take any fish, poisonous or not, and turn it into a tasty, first-class meal that made their taste-buds sing for more. They were stuck with Nami's third-rate, slightly crispy dinners until they could find an island, and a chef.

However, when Nami suddenly collapsed on deck, things went from bad to worse.

Everyone had noticed the growing closeness of Luffy and Nami, but no one had thought anything of it. After all, who would expect innocent little Luffy knowing enough to impregnate their navigator? Strangely, everyone was calm about it, and much to Nami's annoyance, they even went as far as teasing her about it. However, no one made her do anything too strenuous anymore. After all, if she was going to give birth on a pirate ship to their captain's child, that made all of them the baby's family… it made all of them its parents. Sure, by blood Nami and Luffy would be, but everyone on board was adept at teaching certain life lessons.

However, the frequent fainting spells weren't setting Chopper's mind at ease. There was something wrong with her pregnancy… and when he spoke to the navigator about it, she just smiled and nodded, saying that she knew, and had known all along, that something wasn't right. Her tone had been gentle, but her eyes had held an understanding and sadness that Chopper didn't like.

He should have known then.

But no one blamed him.

Five months, five measly months later, Nami paused in yelling at Zoro, her breath hitching, face paling, and her hands clenching the swollen belly. The swordsman, for a loss of what else to do carefully lowered Nami until she was lying on the grass of the deck and shouted for the rest of the crew. Chopper and Robin set up a tent around her writhing form, and the rest of the crew was left to hover and listen to the sounds from within, none of which seemed reassuring.

Pants, grunts, reassuring words, and screams came from the cloth separating them from the two people helping to birth Nami's child. Luffy's face mirrored the look of worry he had when he saw Sanji's bleeding form on deck all those months before, and if one looked closely enough, all of the crew assembled mirrored that emotion.

Usopp was standing, biting his thumb and staring intently at the opening to the makeshift delivery room, flinching at each cry from within. Zoro had taken a seat, and was absently running a hand over the white sword resting against his shoulder as he stared out into space, preoccupied with something… and everything. Franky was pacing, sending the tent a worried glance every now and then, Luffy just stood still, his hands fisted tightly and his bottom lip between his teeth.

Finally, there was one more yell that turned into a choked sob, and the wailings of something else, something entirely new to them and the world, joined in the din. Everyone stopped what they were doing and stood still, craning their ears to hear everything that was going on. Chopper was muttering something in a fast, low voice, but everyone could hear the urgency. Robin was cooing gently to what was obviously the baby, and the sound of something splashing in water came every now and then.

Finally, the white fabric separating them rippled, and from the seam emerged a very weary Chopper, who was quickly crowded by the men of the ship. Not a word was said as they waited, just waited, for the small Doctor's analysis. Finally, Chopper looked up, and one glance at the tears running in tiny rivulets sent Luffy dashing into the tent and made the other crew members mumbled tiny no's and look away, each taking care of their grief in different ways. Usopp hid his face in the crook of his arm, but it did nothing to hide the evidence of his tears. Chopper pulled down his hat with his tiny hooves, attempting to hide the water running down his face, but having about as much result as Usopp. Franky hid his own face in one large hand, sobbing audibly, and Zoro just looked away, his mouth drawn in a thin line of pain and sorrow as he rapidly blinked back tears he hadn't even noticed coming.

Inside the tent, the scene was quite different. The only tears falling were from a small baby cradled in Robin's arms, a third hand extending from her shoulder to run its fingers through the short, soft red-brown hair on the baby's head. Robin's eyes were trained on the figure of her captain, and a two hands grew from the tent, pushing gently at his back and sending him towards the prone, gasping form of Nami on the blanket covered ground.

"There's…" Luffy muttered, and Robin's mouth tilted downwards in an understanding frown, "…so much blood… how… how can there be… so much blood?" the archaeologist had never heard Luffy's voice so sorrow-filled, nor had she seen him so frightened, so pained, as he looked now. However, it wasn't she who spoke up. It was Nami who lifted her head weakly from where she lay to send a shaky smile Luffy's way. It was evident how much her strength was failing her with every shaky, shallow breath.

"There can't," she muttered, and Luffy found himself drawn towards her voice, so he followed what his body wanted and found himself kneeling by her side, his own shaky hand reaching out to thread its fingers through hers. "I love you…"

"I… love you too," Luffy muttered, blinking back what Robin and Nami knew to be tears. "Na-… Nami…" he sighed, closing his eyes and sitting, stroking the back of her hand with his thumb as he thought.

"Take care of her?" she murmured, drawing Luffy out of his mind, causing his breath to hitch and his eyes to blink rapidly. However, he couldn't help that small drop of water to run down his cheek. "I… I don't want her to grow up… only to be hunted," she smiled sadly at her lover, hoping against all hope that he would understand. It was one thing for both of them to be pirates, they had been lucky. There was no way that every other pirate was as kind hearted and fortunate as the eight of them had been… she didn't want her daughter to grow up and be like those other pirates… she wanted her daughter to have the chance at a normal life, uninfluenced by things beyond their control.

"I…" Luffy started, mouth drawn down into a thoughtful frown. Then, he understood Nami's request and smiled, allowing her to know that he did, in fact, understand. "She won't. I'll make sure of that."

Nami smiled, closing her eyes in a wordless sign of thanks… and then she took one last shuddering breath, and any spark of life in her shuddering, pale form was gone. Snuffed out as easily as a candle.

And Luffy cried.

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The pain of our separation was measureless. She had been growing inside my belly for months upon months, and even though she kicked, squirmed, and hurt more than anything I'd ever known, I loved her with every fiber of my being. I suppose that I was lucky to even survive long enough to see her sweet face staring up at me, sniffling up at me as her dark eyes stared into mine, memorizing my face with every ounce of her little baby brain. I could see the light scattering of red-brown hair on her head, and that made me smile against the pain.

I couldn't hear anything, but I noticed when Chopper left and Luffy walked in.

I wonder if that's how Sanji felt when he died… mouth on autopilot while his body just waited to finally pass on. There was no use in fighting the inevitable while you were so close to the edge. There was no use on fighting if even the doctor had walked out on you.

Poor Chopper, I hope he doesn't take it too personally. I've known this was coming since the beginning.

Woman's intuition and all that.

But Luffy, and his face. I wonder if Sanji felt the same way looking up at Zoro. There was a sense of hopelessness on his face that I needed off of there, so I provoked a smile by making him promise me something.

I guess becoming Nakama really makes everyone act the same way in the same situations.

Still, as long as I know my little girl will be safe and will grow up without becoming a wanted pirate, I could be happy… and judging by the smile I finally coaxed from Luffy, I knew he would respect that. He wasn't one to ever break a promise.

I closed my eyes, then, feeling the tug of wherever I was going, and I smiled, fully content for the first time in my life.

There was warmth. Perfect, sudden warmth that filled my entire being. It was perfect, I was happy, I was safe. Wherever I was I knew that I was loved… and that I was complete. As my ears started to hear, they wee met with the gentle sound of waves lapping at the sides of what could only be a ship. My nose started picking up the scent of orange blossoms and the smell of very familiar cooking

I wrenched my eyes open, the sudden blaring of light somehow soothing as I took in the familiar sight of a mast with various metal braces, the familiar head Luffy used to sit on, and the random fixes to walls and railings from Zoro and Sanji's various fights. It was perfect, Merry was perfect. Everywhere I looked memories jumped out at me… and I felt like I was finally home.

A soft presence behind me caused my head to turn with a strange sense of calm, taking in the two figures there with little surprise. He looked just like when we met on the Baratie. Gone was the weariness and maturity he had gained in our two years together, gone was that knowing look in his eyes. He was the bright-eyed teenager he had been in those first few minutes we had met, and as our eyes met, I knew that I had changed as well. The hazy figure hovering over his shoulder smiled, and I had a feeling that Merry had known all along.

His hand raised, palm up in an offering matter that was just so him. His lips twitched upwards into a smile around that cigarette he always seemed to keep clamped in his mouth.

"Come on, Nami-san. I was just making parfaits," and as our eyes met, I smiled and took his offered hand, allowing him to lead me into the galley.

I really was home.


	3. Escape

**Disclaimer: **I don't own One Piece… only the idea… and yeah… if I did own One Piece, why would I be writing this, huh? -sighs- I wanna own it though…

**Chapter Three**

The days following Nami's death were horrible. For a short while Chopper managed to have the baby drink some milk to satisfy its thirst, but it soon became clear that even the treated milk was no substitute for a mother's milk, and no one was brave enough to pump Nami's body for the life-giving milk before they gave her a Viking's burial. And so, at the next island, they left the child in the care of a woman who had just lost her newborn to disease. To all else it would seem as if the pirates had come with a dead babe, and the woman's child had suddenly gotten healthy and strong again. It was a true gift to all of them, but Luffy took it hard. After all, it was the last little thing he had to remember Nami by, for at that island they had picked up another navigator after saving her from some drunkards. Her dreams were the same, and her navigation skills impressive, but never did she have the fervor that Nami did.

The years went by, and the crew remained untouched. No longer were they completely carefree, but they kept their innocence. No other tragedies happened under the watchful eye of Chopper, and everyone became paranoid. They had left the All Blue behind them, and with it Sanji and Nami's grave markers that housed their names, but not their bodies. Their ashes had been scattered to the winds long, long ago.

Yet, even as the crew started to get past the waves of grief that hit them on a nearly daily basis, they couldn't throw the sense of sadness that hung over them like a cloud. Laughter was often forced, and smiles always seemed strained, but over time and over a lot of rum, they finally managed to remember what happiness was, and were able to live with the knowledge that both of their missing crewmates would bash their heads in if they saw them like that.

And with that realized, the Straw Hats were back in business.

With the new ship came new stations that had to be filled. Franky was a carpenter, nothing more, and so the next crewmember they had to find was someone to help maintain the rigging and keep the ropes and such things under strict watch. Well, that and they needed a chef and a musician, but those practically fell into their laps.

Over the next five years, the crew became tight again, with four additions working and trying their best to pick up the slack Sanji and Nami left behind. But still, there was no one besides Luffy that could tie Zoro in a fight, and there was no schemer to keep their money in line. As great as the Straw Hat's bounties were, they became dirt poor, barely managing to get enough supplies to last until the next island.

But still they somehow managed to survive various military attacks and those odd pirates that decided to come out of nowhere with some stupid life goal that included destroying Luffy and his crew. Over all, there was never a dull moment, but neither was there a truly happy one.

It was seven years to the day after Nami died, and it wasn't a happy day. After all, there had never been any good to come out of that anniversary. Each of the crewmembers had their scars from various mishaps during that day, but Luffy's was the longest. Despite Chopper's best treatments, he still had a thick silver scar running from his heel to his shoulder blade from the very marines they found themselves running from.

"Luffy! To your left!" Usopp shouted, ducking under the sword of some military officer to dart to the right a little, watching as their captain swung his left leg out and swept the approaching military personnel with a kick. "Yosh! Gottem!"

"Usopp, watch your right!"

"Ah, Franky behind you!"

"Got your back Minera."

"Robin! Above, above!"

"Zoro! To your… oh… never mind…"

"Luffy! Guns! We need cover!"

It was the basic calls that were sounded whenever they found themselves smack dab in the center of a military base, trying to get out of the cement prison and back to the open seas and the Sunny. They would fight as one, watching each other's backs and trusting everyone to do the same. It was a crude principal, but one that kept them alive through thick and thin.

Zoro was a machine, as he had been since the deaths of his Nakama all those years before. It was hardest to watch his back, for only one was able to do it without getting slashed by the odd sword, and he was but a memory, a fleeting shadow in a fight. And so, Zoro always got the most damage, and always fought alone. Sure, when the rest of the crew needed him he would come to their aid, but the demon was back, and preferred to hunt alone.

Luffy and Usopp, however, fought very differently. Luffy would keep close to the sniper, helping him ward off close range attacks and letting him take care of those out of the reach of his fists and feet. They moved in perfect union, seeming to read each other's minds and take care of those they knew the other could not see. On the battlefield, these two were rarely separated, and no one questioned why. After losing two things dear to him, it was only right for Luffy to keep the one he cared about close.

They were no strangers to the various relationships on the ship. Everyone's business was just that, everyone's business. There was no way to keep a secret in such close quarters. For example, everyone knew that sometimes Zoro would just go into the kitchen, running his hands over the stove. Everyone knew that sometimes he would even smile sadly at the polished black, and run his hands over the sharpened kitchen knives fondly. Everyone knew that some five years back Luffy had pounced the sharpshooter and dragged him into the mikan trees. Everyone _had_ heard the screams turn to moans, after all.

There was just no keeping a secret on a ship, even one as large as the Thousand Sunny.

It had been a stupid way to get kidnapped, even for them. Luffy had decided to give their young chef a break and go out to a restaurant to eat. That was mistake number one. Mistake number two was choosing a restaurant that was run and frequented by off-duty marines. Now, they really should have noticed the big sign above the door that said 'Serving the Marines since 1721' and really should have noticed how nervous everyone looked when they walked through the door. They also should have noticed that the food tasted a little off and that something wasn't right when not only Luffy fell asleep, but Usopp and Robin followed suit. But now, they didn't realize anything was wrong until they all woke up in a prison cell with a leering cadet poking fun at them. Of course, he hadn't really been expecting hands to suddenly appear beneath his shorts, leaving him a blubbering, whining mess while Robin got the keys and allowed all of them to escape.

So there they were, narrowly dodging swords and making their way slowly but surely towards the exit of the base, the ocean nearly in sight. They should have known it had been too easy, they should have known that something bad was about to happen. They should have known that, given their recent bad luck, that disaster would rear its ugly head again.

But maybe they did know. Maybe that's why they were treading so carefully. Maybe that's why even Zoro stopped launching himself into groups of marines in order to stay by his crew's side. Maybe that's why Luffy and Usopp were nearly attached at the hip. They didn't want anyone to be taken away from them, for separation of any kind could mean death. That had been a lesson drilled into their minds from Sanji's death.

But just as a hunter can shoot a bird from a flock, and just as a lion can separate a calf from the herd, a single shot got by Luffy's rubber blockade, and hit home, right in the tight muscle of a flailing leg.

"Shit!" Luffy shouted, wrapping a rubber arm around the stumbling sharpshooter to hoist him up and run, other arm pumping and nostrils flaring as he gasped for air, making sure to quickly close the gap left by the slight stumble. Usopp was just hanging there, gasping and swearing under his breath, tears stinging at the corner of his eyes. He had forgotten how it felt to be shot.

"Luffy! Ahead!" Franky shouted, pointing at the opening that led to the outside world. "We may not make it!'

It was a true fact, for the opening was already half closed by a rapidly descending metal gate, and from the green sheen of it, it was probably seastone. They hadn't heard the scraping of metal against stone over the din of people shouting and guns going off, but now that they had paused to look at the gate, they could hear each chink as the gate was lowered one more notch, and each little noise the gate gave off was like a punch in the stomach.

"Robin!" Luffy shouted above the din, moving slightly to shield Usopp and the rest of the crew from another barrage of gunshots. "Take Usopp, okay?" he asked, unwinding his arm from around the other man's waist and throwing him through the air to where he landed on about twenty arms sprouting from the ground. "I'm gonna distract them. You guys make a run for it."

"That's suicide!" their young chef shouted, eyes wide.

Luffy just turned, looking at the crew with a sad, but oddly reassuring smile.

"I know," he said softly, and then the sadness was gone as the light of battle reignited in his eyes and he turned to leap at the oncoming soldiers, drawing back his arms as bullets hit him, letting both the bullets and his fists fly at the oncoming soldiers.

"That idiot!" Usopp yelled, struggling against the hold of Robin's hands on his clothes as feet sprouted from his back, taking off at a run and carrying him further and further from their fighting captain. "Let me go Robin! He can't take them on by himself, no matter how strong he is! We can't just let him die like this!"

"Its not our choice!" it wasn't Robin who yelled back, but rather Zoro from where he ran just a little ahead of Usopp's struggling form. "Its his, just like it was Sanji's," his voice choked a little on those last words, and Usopp stopped struggling to stare at the swordsman's back. "It's his choice, and no one else's."

They had reached the gate, and Franky, Robin, and the others were making a path through the marines that had rushed up to meet them on the other side. As Usopp and Zoro passed beneath the gate and explosion sounded, and they both saw the body of their captain hit the wall, rebound to the floor, and then slowly push himself to his feet, wiping blood off his lip in annoyance before stubbornly placing himself between the gate and his crew, making sure that no more soldiers made it through behind them.

"His choice, huh?" Usopp asked as Robin's focus on him diminished and the feet and arms holding him steady disappeared, allowing him to push himself to his feet, staring not at the ocean behind them and the path that Zoro, Robin, and Franky were currently working away at but at the tiring form of Luffy.

The gate had five feet until it closed.

Without thinking, and without an ounce of fear in him, Usopp ran forward, ducking under the descending gate, and felt bullets tear through the skin of his arms and legs as soon as he stood up fully on the other side. He bit his lip against the pain, pulling out his slingshot and automatically loading and firing, the pellets exploding as soon as they met skin, weapon, and dirt, effectively distracting both Luffy and the fighting marines enough to give Usopp the time he needed, the time he wanted.

Without giving Luffy time to think about anything that was happening, he took a fistful of his captain's vest, summoned all the strength in his body, and threw Luffy backwards, letting loose three exploding stars after him to assist in the throw.

The gate had two feet until it closed, and Luffy slid under it, somersaulting to his feet and darting forward with fear in his eyes.

Usopp just grinned at his captain, his lover, as the gate slid further and further down, and just before it closed, shutting the outside off from anything that happened on the inside, the sound of hundreds of bullets hitting metal rang through the air, almost drowned out by Luffy's scream.

--------------------

I guess no one can say I didn't die as a brave man of the sea. I fulfilled that goal of mine, even if I had to give up others. There was just something about hearing Zoro talk of having a choice and watching Luffy fight for our lives that hit something, made me react in ways I never thought possible.

It was a final act of bravery, and I was never happier.

I knew that I would be leaving them, further shattering the bond we original Straw Hats had, but I just couldn't let Luffy die like that. He deserved more, he deserved another chance to meet up with Shanks, to give him that hat he would only let a few chosen people touch. I had fulfilled my goal, I was finally acting brave, but perhaps it was selfishness showing through. I just didn't want to go through the same pain of watching a loved one die without ever fulfilling their dreams. Both Sanji and Nami had passed too early, never seeing the All Blue, never finishing that map… I didn't want Luffy to go without becoming the pirate king.

And so I acted, I made my own choice about my life, and Luffy's. I made the choice that I would die, not our idiot captain. If anyone should be at fault for what happened, its Zoro, and I hope he's happy about that.

After all, I allowed a dream to live on… and Luffy's made that point the most important in all of our lives. A dream is worth dying for, just as much as it's worth living for because some dreams can only be achieved through knocking on death's door and then darting away at the last minute.

I wish I could tell them that it didn't hurt, that I never actually felt the bullets hit me. I guess I wasn't really that brave after all, 'cause I think I passed out as soon as the gate shut off my line of vision to Luffy's face.

Maybe that's why even after the fact, even as I could feel the rock of a ship, the warmth of the sun, and hear the murmurs of people conversing nearby, I stayed with my hands covering my eyes, crouched in a defensive position, not daring to open my eyes.

But something was poking at me, saying that this was definitely too familiar. Saying that I should recognize those faces, know the feel of the wood beneath my shoes, and that I should open my eyes to see where I was, and see if it was good or bad. After all, we were pirates, and I was almost convinced we would be going some place bad, despite our good intentions.

It took a while to realize that there was, in fact, something poking me… in the side… rather hard.

I took a chance and opened my eyes, peering through my spread fingers at the thing jabbing me in the side, and stared at the black dress shoe in interest. There was only one person who would be standing on a ship and jabbing me in the side with a polished shoe, and that person was dead… and I was dead… and as I let my eyes travel up the figure beside me and took in the cigarette hanging from slightly smiling lips and that curled eyebrow over a blue eye sparkling in semi-amusement, and that blonde hair covering the left side of his face, it all made sense why the food jabbing me in the ribs hurt. After all, Sanji had hard shoes… and…

"GHOST!" I shouted, jumping to my feet and stumbling back (not quite used to the fact that I was on a ship) before catching myself on the railing behind me. I was breathing heavily, but not only from the scare Sanji had just given me, but from the fact that I _knew_ the railing I was leaning against. I knew it just as much as I knew the patchwork repairs lining the deck, mast, and other railing along the ship I was on.

"Well… yeah," Sanji said, a full grin on his face as he looked me over. "You look good, Usopp."

I just stared at him before movement from the upper deck caught my eye, and I saw Nami grinning and waving at me, looking as childish and as happy as she had after Arlong had been taken out.

"I was actually expecting Luffy would come next," she called down, laughter evident in her voice. "I could just see him choking on a chicken bone or something without Sanji or me to watch him. Oh, speaking of food… is lunch ready yet Sanji-kun? I'm a little hungry."

"HAI NAMI-SWAN!" Sanji called, pirouetting around to face her, hands clasped in front of his chest. I managed a small grin, heart still pounding from the fact that I had just found myself plopped down on the deck of our old ship, watching Sanji dote on Nami like at the beginning of our adventures together. I half expected to hear Luffy laughing behind me, to hear Zoro's biting remark about Sanji's attitude, to hear Chopper talking excitedly to Franky, to hear Robin's quiet laughter, and to hear Franky's loud-mouthed reply.

And as Sanji literally pranced towards the galley, I saw a figure in the rosy clouds around us, sitting at the mast head of Merry and laughing, a wooden mallet by its crossed legs.

Even in death, things didn't really change.


	4. Sickness

After Usopp died, Luffy withdrew. He withdrew from the sea, from fighting, from the crew, and even from himself until the only one that could get near him without Luffy suddenly erupting into hysteric tears was Zoro, who would just sit next to his captain in Nami's quarters, not speaking, not moving but just being in pain together. Sure, Zoro had only lost one person whom he loved and Luffy two, but the pain was the same, just on newer wounds.

They went on, sailing lifelessly until they came to the next island. Everyone was weary, and everyone was depressed, so when they landed on the next island, uninhabited by everything but a scattering of animals, they anchored their ship and stayed there for almost a year, just paying their respects to the three people who had been taken from them, trying to cope, trying to get better. Sure, they started heading towards getting over it, but as their recent stream of bad luck suggested, disaster wasn't over yet, it was still seeking them out one by one.

One week before they were planning to leave, that disaster caught them, biting at their heels with the ferocity of a rabid dog. It struck in the form of sickness, attacking the one officially the eldest, officially the nearest to death, officially the most necessary of them all.

Seven measly days before they were set to leave, a sickness known only to that island struck the only one capable of healing it. Chopper was down for the count.

He had been walking with Franky, laughing and crying about Usopp's life and how he had touched each of them, when suddenly he fell over, coughing, convulsing, and when Franky touched his forehead, he was burning up. It took four days until his fever went down, and when Chopper was coherent and strong enough to get out of bed and work on an antidote he found out something that just further pushed their fragile bond towards breaking point.

There was no cure.

The sickness came from a plant, as the animals told him, and it only affected the cells of animals, most often killing them with the first strike. If one survived the initial attack then it was in their cells. It could be treated, but only with the flower freshly cut.

It came down to the little doctor either choosing to go with his Nakama and die within days or staying on the island and treating his illness for as long as he could last but being alone in the meantime.

After days of arguing it, with Chopper being all for trying to grow the plants on the ship and treat himself while remaining with everyone else and the rest of the crew saying that he shouldn't risk it and stay on the island and live, they had gotten nowhere, and had just started testing the patience and fragile emotions of the crew. There was seldom someone that wasn't crying with all the stress everyone was under.

Finally, it got too much for even Luffy. He had heard everything, but stayed in grieving, huddled in Nami's chart room, clutching his head and only responding to Zoro by telling him to make it stop. However, by the time that everyone was done with everything, and the arguments barely lasted a minute without someone loosing it and screaming and crying, he was drawn out of his shell.

He came out on deck, straw hat hanging around his neck, red vest hanging on a thin, but still as strong frame, eyes shadowed with signs of sleep deprivation, and mouth drawn in a tight line. All arguments stopped as Luffy moved across the deck with a purpose, stopping in front of an angry but sniffling Chopper. He paused, staring his doctor in the eyes for a minute, as everyone watched. Finally, Chopper reached up to the rim of his hat with two shaking hooves, pulling it down over his eyes as a sob tore from his throat.

"By staying here… it'll be like… loosing everyone at once," he muttered, voice broken with sobs and hiccups. His small shoulders shook as he tried his best to suppress the harsh sobs, and Luffy knelt down, throwing his arms around the small reindeer and burying his face into Chopper's furry shoulder, tears soaking the doctor's fur as they cried together, embracing each other and trying to find solace in the company and the time they had left.

"Please," Luffy whispered, voice hoarse and somber, two things that Chopper had never heard before in his captain's tone. "Please, please, please don't… don't make me go through this again…" he shifted slightly, burrowing further into Chopper's fur. "It… its selfish, I know… but… please don't make me watch someone else I love die… please just live… because as long as you live… as long as you live there's hope, right?"

Chopper moved his hooves against Luffy's shoulders, pushing the elder boy back until he could see Luffy's tear-stained face and the pure agony and tiredness etched into his features, both maturing and aging him by leaps and bounds in such a short time. It had been hard on all of them, but those who took the biggest fall had been Luffy and Zoro, and no one could blame them.

"I'll stay," Chopper muttered, this time burying his face into Luffy's chest, sobs wracking his body again and making his high voice waver. "I'll stay, I'll write, and I'll find a cure and sail with you again someday. I promise!"

And for the rest of that night the five remaining original Straw Hats sat and talked, sometimes crying, mostly drinking, and seldom laughing. It wasn't a happy farewell party, but it was as close to happiness as they could get.

The next morning, when the Thousand Sunny finally pulled up anchor and sailed away from the island, Chopper stood and waved until long after he couldn't see the ship, tears falling down his face, soaking his fur as he fought to keep a forced smile on his face. He didn't have to see to know that Franky and Luffy were both standing there, crying and waving with all their strength, shouting goodbyes long after they knew that Chopper couldn't hear them. He didn't have to see them to know that Zoro and Robin were standing next to them, watching the island fade into the distance with sad smiled on their faces, making sure that the two idiots in between them didn't fall into the ocean.

Luffy had made a promise to come back to the island and visit Chopper, and he did. He came to visit almost one year later, but by then it was too late. By then the sickness had taken hold and completely destroyed over half of the animal population, including Chopper. But from what they could gather through the animal's charades and Chopper's notes, the little reindeer hadn't thought about his own sickness and instead treated the others, eventually wasting away even as he was treating them.

There were no tears shed at this farewell, there were only flowers placed on a makeshift grave, there were only four shadows falling on the ground as they said goodbye to the fourth person to leave them.

As horrible as it was, they were starting to understand the fragility of life on the seas.

----------------

I stood, watching as they sailed away, flanked by the other animals on the island, crying and shivering from the fever I had not yet recovered from. Even after they had disappeared I stood there, waving until I couldn't feel my arm, knowing that even if they couldn't see me anymore, they still knew that I was standing here, waving them off, making sure that as far as I knew they had left unscathed, and as far as they knew I was still standing. Far into the afternoon I stood there, not caring that I had long since sunk to my knees. By nightfall, I just fell asleep where I had stood all day, kept warm by those that had accompanied me throughout the day.

The next morning I spent a good hour just staring out at the sea, watching as the waves washed up on the beach, missing the feel of a deck beneath my hooves and the absence of the gentle rocking motion that was just so soothing on a hard day.

Deep down, I knew that I would never be able to feel that way again. I was old, for a reindeer, and now that I was sick, it shortened my life span drastically. I knew Luffy would keep his promise, I knew he would come back to the island some day in order to visit… I just knew that I wouldn't last long enough to see him again.

The days became routine.

I would get up, walk down to the beach, and watch the waves for a while, thinking about our adventures together, thinking about the laughter and the tears, and thinking about how much I was missing everyone. After about an hour I would turn, leaving the sea at my back, and I would start treating the symptoms of the fevers and other sicknesses the disease of the flower inflicted. After treating every animal and talking with them for a while, I would go and try and work on a cure, hitting dead ends about every day. I just didn't have enough equipment with me.

Every day it became harder and harder to pull myself away from the ocean, and every day it became more and more of a challenge to drag myself out of bed. I had no time to take care of myself, because I had to work on producing mass quantities of medicine that would help ease the fevers. I had no time to worry about myself… but that didn't mean that I couldn't worry about Luffy and the others. They were amazing. I still have no idea how they managed to treat themselves before I joined the crew. Trouble always seemed to sniff them out, and normally that meant getting stabbed through the stomach or chest, almost getting a limb whacked off, or just getting whacked in the head a bunch. I wasn't worried about sickness, since everyone on board was amazing in that regard. None of them ever got sick… ever.

But still, every day I could feel more and more strength leaving me. My fur started graying and hanging in lifeless clumps, my vision became blurry and whenever I passed by a pool of water I saw the cloudy beginning of cataracts. It took longer and longer to get to the ocean every morning, and pretty soon I could feel my joints creaking and swelling up.

I had been prepared for this back on Drum Island, but not on that godforsaken island. I didn't have Dr. Kureha's secrets; I only had the native flowers and what little equipment I had kept from the Sunny to keep me alive. Frankly, it wasn't enough.

The sun rose on that fateful day that I couldn't even find the strength to get out of bed, and some inner timer seemed to go off, warning me that my time was close. From the inner reaches of the flat island, you can't see the ocean, and even though I was going blind, could barely move my joints, and had a fever enough to incapacitate a young human, I just wanted to see the ocean one last time.

I've seen pets die in the village I grew up in. I know how it goes, and even though I'm partially human, that didn't change anything. I managed one last transformation into running point, and managed to stumble out of my little hut, various concerned patients and friends gathering around to try and stop me, to try and make sure that I stayed alive just a little longer.

But routine was routine, and by the time I dragged myself to the edge of our little village, they knew that I was determined, even though my hind legs were already starting to fail. By the time I had reached the path leading to the sea, I was pulling myself along with my front legs, hindquarters no longer able to support my weight. Tears were running down my face, soaking my fur as much as my sweat was. I only managed a couple more feet before my front legs gave out and I collapsed in one twisted, sobbing, heap of fur.

I needed to see the ocean one last time.

I needed to feel the spray of the water.

I needed to remember the salty smell of the sea.

I needed to look to the horizon, seeing if Luffy's ship was coming back.

It was stupid to think they would come back, but every time I saw the ocean, it filled me with strength, with hope, and I just needed to feel that one last time.

My eyes slid shut, and I remember cursing my weakness, cursing my inability to drag myself as far as the sea.

A moment later, I realized I was moving.

During my lapse of consciousness, the animals I had been watching over had found a giant palm leaf and had managed to get me onto it, using their combined strength to start to drag me further and further down the path.

Not many of them were in better shape, but somehow they managed, and as we emerged from the jungle and the sea breeze hit me, I regained a little of my strength and managed t get to my feet, stumbling off the leaf and into the surf, collapsing again and letting the gentle waves lap against my fur as I lay there, vision blurred with my failing strength and the glare of the sun against the waves.

The sea, so vast, so full of life, so ferocious, and so calm. It smelled of salt and water… it smelled of something i alive /i . And as I lay there in the surf, feeling the rest of my strength fade away with each shuddering breath, I smiled through my tears, raising my head a little to look out towards the cliffs I had last seen the Thousand Sunny. There, perched on top of the rocks was the small pirate flag I had made that day. It had the Jolly Roger, but underneath it were sakura blossoms, a hoof-print, and a straw hat.

My eyes filled with tears, spilling the salty water into the surf, adding to the vastness of the ocean before me.

I tilted my head back and used the last of my strength to yell out, voice thick with tears.

"AAAHHH! I'M A PIRATE! A GREAT DOCTOR! SANJI, USOPP, NAMI, LUFFY, ROBIN, FRANKY, ZORO! I WON'T GIVE UP!!!"

And with one final choked sob, I allowed my head to fall into the waves lapping at my fur; a smile crossing my face as darkness finally overtook my vision.

No one could say that I didn't die happy.

As the darkness started to fade away, I felt the sun warming my fur, the aches and pains in my joints dissolving to be replaced with quivering energy. I could almost feel my fur bristle with the energy suddenly lining my muscles, and every ounce of sickness faded away. With a happy sigh, I inhaled the scent of oranges, the sea, and familiar cooking. They were all scents that I missed, and scents that I never thought I would smell again. A giggle from behind me caused my eyes to snap open as I panicked, jumping up and hiding behind the mast… or… at least trying to. I stared with wide eyes at the figure partially obscured by the clouds around us, smiling widely at me in a welcoming gesture. I blinked, relaxing slightly as I stared at that figure. I could almost hear the hum of its life in my ears, and recognized it immediately, my eyes filling up with tears as I stared, just stared.

"M-Merry," I murmured, finally giving into my emotions and sobbing, embracing the mast like a lost lover. "ITS MERRY!" I shouted, burying my face into the wood, tears soaking my fur again as I sobbed, a smile almost painfully stretching my face. "ITS REALLY MERRY!"

There was a laugh behind me that caused my ears to prick and my body to whirl around, taking in the smiling figure of the sharpshooter before launching myself into his arms, laughing and crying as he caught me, embraced me, and then set me down, allowing me to run around the ship, taking in every little detail and recalling all the stories, all the memories associated with it.

The galley door swung open and there was Sanji, leaning against the door frame with a towel slung over his shoulder, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and a cigarette hanging between his lips. There was Nami just laying there, tanning on the deck, raising a lazy arm to push up her sunglasses and smile as I ran by, sobbing, laughing, and occasionally tripping in my haste.

They all watched, smiled and chuckles escaping them as I dashed around, finally jumping up to land on the figurehead, throwing my arms out as I closed my eyes, smile still spread across my face.

"I'M HOME!" I shouted, not caring how ridiculous I sounded, for at that moment, even though I was dead, it really was like finally coming home.


	5. APPOLOGY

I am writing this as an apology to my readers. Unfortunately, I fell out of the One Piece fandom over the past few years. As a result, my fanficition turned elsewhere until it finally faded out. I haven't written fanfiction for almost a year now… however, fanime recently resparked my interest in One Piece, and recently I've been looking for a way to dust off my pen and get back to writing.

On a whim, my friend convinced me to look at my old account, and lo and behold what did I find? This ficlet. While reading through it made me laugh and cringe at the need for edits, I found myself tearing up and even remembering how I was going to end it all. So, I'm rewriting it.

I figure hey, it'll be a perfect warm-up for the Ren/Yoh fanfiction epic I'm going to start writing, and it's a worthwhile piece. After all, my ending for Zoro will be quite the tear-jerker. That ending is the real reason I kept writing even as my interest dwindled.

So, hopefully I will get a rewritten first chapter out soon for you guys. It'll be written to include Brooke and the events at Thriller Bark… and will hopefully be beta'd. If anyone would like to help edit for me, I'd LOVE that, just shoot me an email at fearthemightypen gmail

Once again I'm soooo sorry for just dropping off the face of the planet for two whole years, and I hope rewriting, revamping, and finishing the story will be enough to make it up to you all.

Love

Kelly


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